Clear Vision

When I was 9 years old I got my first pair of glasses.  It was long overdue.  I still remember seeing the real world for what seemed like the first time.  I was amazed by the colors and detail.  Since then, I've always needed glasses and every visit to the doctor brought stronger lenses so I could continue to view the world in all its glory.

But for the past few years new glasses just don't work anymore.  I have cataracts and they only get worse with time.  A cloud obscures every scene.  I try to read around it in frustration.  I can't drive at night anymore because of the glare of headlights.  My optometrist said surgery was the only option.  But...when I go for a big evaluation at the laser eye center, they tell me I am at risk for a complication that would make things worse, not better! What to do?  It's also an expensive procedure, even with insurance.  I agonize over this decision.

So after much prayer and research and discussion, I decide to go ahead with my worst eye. There are no more options.  It's a somewhat scary day in the surgical suite.  They are going to remove my cataract with a laser and implant an artificial lens!  I will be awake.  I could go blind.  But then, I am going blind anyway.

The procedure itself is over in minutes.  I am wheeled back to a chair and sit upright and open my eyes.  I do not have my glasses on, yet I can clearly see across the room!  Amazing!  It's a miracle!

I guess people will say it's not really a miracle.  It's just the expertise of talented doctors.  And my doctor is one of the best.  (I researched him, of course.)  But for a person who has struggled to see clearly for over 50 years, this is a real miracle for me.  I am on a cocktail of eye drops for the next month and I have to be very careful to protect this new lens.  My vision is not perfect.  After all my other eye has no correction.  If I wear my glasses, my new eye can't see through them.  If I take off my glasses, my new eye works, but not the other.  But when I wake up in the middle of the night, I can see the alarm clock.  When I take a shower, I can see the soap.  Little things most people probably take for granted.

I think about one blind man that Jesus healed.  "Jesus took the blind man by the hand and led him out of the village, and when he had spit on his eyes and laid his hands on him, he asked him, 'Do you see anything?' And he looked up and said, 'I see men, but they look like trees walking.' Then Jesus laid his hands on his eyes again, and he opened his eyes, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly."  (Mark 8)

So right now I see men that look like trees walking.  But in God's good time, my sight will be restored.  And while physical sight is a gift from God, I pray through all this that God will continue to always correct my spiritual vision.  I want to view this world and my life through the lens of God's word--to see things the way he does and live accordingly.

Back in the Saddle

 

We haven't ridden our bikes in a very long time.  I don't know why because we greatly enjoy biking on the trails near our house.  So on the 4th of July Fred suggested we go.  There were several reasons not to go--I'm worried about Fred's injured hand and his new thyroid med dosage that increases his risk for heart arrhythmia.  Also, it's very hot and humid this day and I don't tolerate the heat too well.  And even the girls aren't very enthusiastic about going.  But we go anyway!

It is bright and hot and sunny and beautiful.  In no time we are flying down the paved paths along the rivers.  It's been so rainy the past few weeks, and everything is green and lush.  Birds of all kinds call out through the trees.  Arielle and I take the lead and I so much like riding with her. 

Good thing we went early in the morning.  By noon the heat is stifling.  We come home tired, toasted, and relaxed.  What a fun family time!  But Liana had a bit of a struggle riding.  Her bike is much too small.  We decide we want to make biking more a regular part of life, so we head to Walmart to look for a new bike for her.  She finds a beauty!  It is like mine--sturdy and secure.  She tries it out in the driveway--about the most difficult place to ride with the slope and the stone wall and the cars.  Hopefully soon she can take it out on  the trail. 

 

Fred has to work early the next day, so we pass on our community fireworks.  I find out Arielle is very disappointed.  I didn't know she enjoys them so much.  After it got dark she calls us into her room and we discover we can see fireworks from faraway out her window.  So we sit and watch.  These are not our local fireworks but from the direction, I think they are a neighboring township about 7 miles away.  Liana takes dozens of pictures.  Pretty good considering the distance!  She's become quite a photographer.

Arielle tells me to look out her other window that faces the woods behind our house. To my delight I see thousands of lights flickering off and on from the ground all the way up to high in the trees.  Fireflies!  I can't believe it!  I've never seen so many and they are so bright, glowing with their own silent rhythm.  God's fireworks!  And they go on and on after the finale of the local show.  Arielle says she watches them every night before she goes to sleep. 

A beautiful 4th of July.  Wonderful family time once again. 

Fashion Revue

 The girls finally finished their dresses just in time for the competition. We're all happy.  It's been a long six months and a long week doing all the last minute details.  Frustration...aggravation...Arielle decided she will never sew again.  She says that every year. 

Today was the big day.  The girls put on their fabulous dresses and waited for the judging.  I was a "timer" making sure each participant was in front of the judges exactly 3 minutes.  In that time the judges ask questions about the outfit and the girls tell about their sewing experience making it.  Once that was over the girls enjoyed workshops doing crafts.  Families arrived (our family was well represented) and the show began!  All the senior girls (over 13) modeled their outfits and then all the junior girls and then the first year girls, which included my granddaughter Mattie.  The little girls only made tote bags and pillowcases, but they had their moment of glory on the stage.

The winners were announced!  Arielle qualifies to compete at the state level again!  And Liana and Julia won in the junior division! 

Update on Fred

I am amazed at Fred's recovery from his hand injury.  He took a couple of pain pills the first day but said they made him nauseous, so he decided not to take any more.  I was apprehensive about the first dressing change, but there was no redness or swelling--just black bruising and long rows of stitches.  Yesterday he saw a hand specialist.  Bone infection, loss of use of his fingers, and nerve damage are the big concerns.

The doctor said he is healing just fine.  He explained to Fred that the only way NOT to have nerve damage to your fingers is to cut them exactly how Fred did it--lengthwise down the center, avoiding the nerves along the sides.  And Fred came millimeters away from cutting his tendon in the most damaged finger.  So overall, the accident was a miracle.  We don't know why it happened (apart from the fact that hedge clippers have sharp blades!) but we know who watched out for him that morning.  We are thankful to God that all is well. 

Maybe Fred will be more careful...

Since we've been married Fred has had six visits to the ER and three surgeries.  And the surgeries came about from accidents.  There is also another hand injury when he should have had stitches and wouldn't go to the doctor.  We live in anticipation of the next event.  It's a family joke, but really not so funny.  I pray for Fred every day.

Back to the ER

 

I was at 4-H with the girls and got a phone call on my cell.  It was Fred.  He said, "Don't panic."  So I knew it was bad news.

When I left in the morning Fred had plans to trim the hedges with his new gasoline-powered clippers.  The hedges are about 7 feet tall and he has to stand on a ladder to cut them.  Damien used to do it for us, but he is busy now with a baby.  I was uneasy about Fred doing this work when we wouldn't be home, but he doesn't listen to my concerns.  He said he'd have his cell phone, don't worry. 

So while I am panicking on the phone, Fred says he cut himself and he is on the way to the ER with our neighbor driving him.  I tell him I am coming.  The 4-H teachers jump into action, offering to take care of the girls, drive them home, whatever I needed.  I leave the girls in their care and head out.

Fred has already been taken back when I get there and blood is everywhere.  One of our hand towels is soaked with it.  His whole hand is a mass of red, the drying blood gluing his fingers together.  He has blood on his clothes and on his arms.  A jolly nurse is making jokes while she cleans him up.  Once his hand is clean, Fred is surprised to see he cut two fingers, not just one as he thought before.  They are both cut lengthwise down the center.  I guess that's better.  If the cut had been crosswise, he would have lost his fingers.  Even so, one of them is cut far enough down he has sliced the bone in half.  Fred says he is going to have forked fingers.

After several hours at the ER, Fred is stitched up, bandaged up and sent home with a prescription for an antibiotic and the name of a hand specialist to see next week.  We are grateful.  This could have been so much worse. 

 

What are we going to do with these hedges now?  I forgot to say how Fred did this.  He was cutting across the top and saw a bird nest with five tiny birds looking up at him.  He jerked the saw blade away to keep from hurting them.  That put him off balance and he reached out to steady himself--and sliced his fingers.

Our Father

Father's Day just passed and I've been reading tributes to fathers on Facebook.  How wonderful that some people have had good fathers.  Years ago I was watching a soccer game along with many other parents.  A father beside me was holding his little daughter in his arms and I could see the deep love and affection he had for her.  Tears sprang to my eyes with longing and regret.  I never had that kind of fatherly love.  I won't rehash all my father issues, but once again, I've been thinking of fathers.  For two of my sons, this was their first Father's Day!

When I  became a Christian, one of the first verses I memorized was John 1:12:  "But to all who received him (Jesus), who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God."  Was I really a child of God?  God was my Father?  What did that mean?  I didn't know how to trust and depend on a father.

A bad father isn't trustworthy.  He could be kind one day and cruel the next.  I've read that children that grow up in a home with that kind of uncertainty live tortured lives because they never know what to expect.  A bad father doesn't care about his children's needs; he is self-centered. He neglects his children.  He is distant, withholding love.  He is a hard disciplinarian, sometimes using physical violence or words that hurt just as badly.  Bad fathers invoke fear, distrust, disgust, and hatred.  A child's response is to flee.  That's just what I did at age 18.

I knew God was a good father but I thought he was a punishing father.  I could never live up to his expectations and I lived in self-condemnation for many years.  That is still an issue I struggle with at times.  I couldn't understand unconditional love.  How can God the Father still love me when I did this and this and this?  I could fill in the blanks with a list of sins.  Why hasn't God given up on me?  Why does he continue to forgive and to love and to bless me?  I don't deserve it.

From the examples of my husband, my brothers, and my own sons I have learned what a good father looks like.  He is faithful and consistent with his children.  They know what to expect.  He loves always and always forgives.  He is generous, sacrificing his own needs for those of his children.  He lavishes love on them with his strong arms and encouraging words.  Yes, there is discipline, but discipline to train, to show right from wrong.  But it is not harsh and it hurts the father to give it.  A good father protects with his life and provides everything the children need.  They respond with repentance for wrongdoing, gratitude, respect and obedience. They long for his presence.  My girls are always saying, "When is Dad coming home?"  They miss him when he isn't here.

I realize my husband portrays unconditional love, not just to his children but to me all the time too.  I often hurt him with harsh words.  I know I must disappoint him and discourage him at times.  But like God the Father, he continues to forgive, and to love, and to bless me. Fred has taught me to accept the Father's love and not fear his rebuke and withdrawal. 

For those who have good fathers, be grateful for that great gift.  What a privilege to be raised by a man who reflects God's love.  And for those who don't have a father like that or those who have no earthly father any longer, learn to trust God.  He is a Father who keeps all the promises in his Word. In the Psalms there is a repeating refrain: "God's steadfast love and faithfulness."   I've learned to trust my heavenly Father.  He is always near, always listening, and he never gives up on me. 

"See what kind of love that Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God:  and so we are."  I John 3:1.

Play-date with Jordan

Jordan came to play!  Her mom started a new job and needed us to watch Jordan for the afternoon.  We had such a good time with her.  I was so glad to have time to get to know my newest granddaughter a little better now that she isn't such a little baby.  As my mother always says about babies like her, "She has personality plus!"  What a character she is!

Jordan is 8 months old now and she likes moving around and she likes toys.  So Liana used those two interests to get her to work her way across the room to get to her toy.  She has this new stuffed dog that plays music and talks.  Stuffed toys are different than they used to be.  (But then Arielle had those silly Teletubbies...)  Jordan really wanted that dog and she went for it.  She also sat through a whole picture book as I read it to her.  She's my kind of girl!

My friend Connie stopped over with her granddaughter Skylar.  So Jordan had a real play-date with another little person.  Connie and I laughed so much watching the two of them.  When Jordan was leaving, Skylar gave her a little wave and Jordan actually put up her hand to wave too.  Too cute! 

In the midst of the noise and confusion Jordan fell asleep in my arms.  What could be better than that, to hold a precious sleeping child?  I love this little girl so much and anticipate many fun times with her.

I guess I am at THAT stage in life--my friends are also grandmas and we are delighting together in our grandchildren.  It's a wonderful time!

Leaving Cherokee

We drive my mom back to her house late at night after our Family Feud game.  She asks, "Are you coming by in the morning before you go?"  Fred says no, we're getting an early start.  I am surprised and not prepared to say good-bye to my mother right now.  So this is it. She runs to her bedroom to get her parting gifts--nuts and candies, little treats for the road.  She is such a generous person.  Then final good-bye hugs with my little mother standing in her living room.  I don't want to leave her.  Sorrow in my heart, as always.  How many times have we had to say good-bye through the years?  It never gets easier.

As we always do, we drive past her front door, pause, and she stands in the doorway to wave.  Tears blur my eyes and I can hardly see her. 

Early the next day we eat breakfast in silence, all of us thinking of the last few days and leaving everyone once again.  It's a cool, crisp morning in the mountains and I take this picture from the front of our room.  The views here are spectacular from every angle, but my camera can just not capture the beauty and grandeur. You have to see it for yourself.  A verse comes to mind, "As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds his people." (Psalm 125)  I pray God would surround my family.  We pack up and go.

 

The highway switches back and forth between the mountains, winding and turning up and down and around the peaks.  Fred gets a text message and I take his phone.  It's my brother Jim.  He is sitting outside on top of his mountain, thinking of us.  We finally drive across the Tennessee state line.  I look behind to see the Great Smokies sheltering my beloved family.  Our thoughts turn to home.

Last Day Together

It's a lazy Sunday with a lot of sitting around.  That's what this family does best--sit and talk. We decide to meet at Oconaluftee Islands Park and then think about what to do.  Arielle said she hoped we would come here before we leave. Every town should have a park like this.  In the middle of town, in the middle of the river, is an island with plenty of space to take a walk, wade in the river, skip rocks, fish, feed ducks or just have a picnic.  It is beautiful and relaxing. There is also a towering bamboo tunnel. Here they call it "river cane" but it looks just like what we have in our backyard, only ours is not so tall. My niece Monica doesn't live in the area, but she comes down for the day.  I haven't seen her since she was a little girl.  Even though she's grown up now, she is still my sweet niece and it is so good to be together with her.  My girls have a wonderful time playing with little Kaneya and Kaneya now knows what the word "cousin" means.  Cousins are fun people to have in your life!  And she's got lots of them.

Finally everyone arrives and we spend a lot of time deciding what to do.  One time years ago the whole family spent a whole day trying to figure out what to do, and we ended up not having time to do anything!  So this is typical for my family.  Always trying to please the kids, we say let's just go back to the hotel and swim.  Perfect!  We stake out tables and my sister and mom and I sit and talk while others dip in and out of the pool.  The adults (not the kids) decide to have a water fight with water guns and some kind of floaty blocks that they throw at each other.  Good thing we're the only ones here.  My brother Jim says he loves when Fred makes his transformation in the water.  Fred becomes a kid!  Jim does too.  They are both so silly--grown men in their fifties!  My sister goes out to get pizza and even gets a gluten-free one for me.  Delicious food, dear and precious family, each one of them.  We eat and laugh and talk some more. 

Kelly invites us back to her house for sherbet.  We just want to be together as long as we can.  How nice it is to spend time with my little sister!  We go out on her deck  at dusk to feed her 18 wild cats and watch them cautiously creep up the steps to eat.  I've never seen so many cats at one time. The girls are delighted. My niece Alex brings out a Family Feud TV game and we break up into two teams to play. Everyone gets more goofy the later it gets. Now it's nearly midnight and time for tears and hugs and good-byes.  It will be a long drive home tomorrow.

Deep Creek

We're gathering at our traditional reunion destination--our family from Georgia and Tennessee, Asheville, and the locals in Cherokee.  My mom and sister have prepared a feast for us all--chicken, slaw, pasta salad (a gluten-free one too).  Others brought chips and fruit and drinks.  Kelly made cupcakes so we can celebrate her granddaughter's 3rd birthday.  It's exciting to see each new arrival pull up next to our picnic site, some loved ones we haven't seen in years. We sit on lawn chairs and catch up on family news and then rearrange ourselves and talk to someone else. And eat, of course.  My big, wonderful, crazy family!  I think of my big, wonderful, crazy family back home in Pennsylvania and wish they and their families could be here too. They need to better know their aunts and uncles and see where they came from.  It's amazing--I see my boys in the faces and mannerisms of their uncles.

 

We take a long hike along the creek through the cool, lush forest just like we did two years ago and many other times in the past. The tubers float down the stream and we laugh and remember when we went tubing here long ago.  I don't know if there is any place on earth more beautiful than the Great Smoky Mountains. Fred took the time to sit and contemplate life. But I enjoy the company of my nieces as we chatter and hike.  The reward at the end of the trail is a lovely waterfall.  On the way down we take another family photo on the bridge, just like we did years ago.  At that moment I think, this is a magical time--a time to be thankful for family, all of us gathering in this place once again.  We're still here on this good earth. 

People leave in different directions to return home after hugs and sad good-byes.  Those of us who are last to leave join hands and give thanks to God for his blessing on our family and ask him to continue to take care of us all.

Back Home to Cherokee

Here we are again!  I've never lived here, but coming to my mom's house is like coming home.  So many good times here.  As we climb up and down the last mountain and get nearer, memories rise up wispy and fleeting in my mind, like the smoke on the mountains. I think of the time we introduced our girls to family, first Arielle, then Liana.  Our South Carolina land fiasco that devastated us, but still brought us together with family who helped us get through it.  So many long talks with my mom in her living room.  Sharing life crossroads with my brothers. And I always go back to that memory of my first visit here alone when I was falling apart.  It was fall, cold and cloudy, the mountains ominous like the direction I was heading.  My sister Kelly, so young then, drove me all around on these steep roads, she and my mom reminding me of who I was--loved and accepted no matter what.  I will be forever grateful to them both for what they did for me on that trip.

Finally today we pull up in Grandma's gravel driveway and there she is on the ramp welcoming us once again!  The girls run up for hugs and we come into her peaceful little home for lots of talk and good food.  Home is where you are loved, isn't it?  We talk on into the evening and Kelly and her daughter and granddaughter arrive and there is more fun and laughter.  I feel an even deeper connection to my sister now that we are older and have shared so much through the years.

The next day we visit the old tourist shops in town and remember other vacations.  We stroll through the Mountain Farm Museum at the base of the majestic Smokies and learn how the white settlers came to the area and lived.  My people living in this beautiful place, sheltered by towering mountains and refreshed by cool streams.  Later my niece Alex and her boyfriend take us to the Oconaluftee Indian Village, an outdoor living history museum and we hear lectures on how the Cherokees lived on this land in the 1800's before their removal.  Again, my people, the ancient settlers.  I'm glad to have time with my niece, this little girl all grown up, so much a part of every visit to North Carolina.  She has a child of her own, an adorable child bringing much joy to our family. I think of how one day my daughters might bring their own children here. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In the evening we take our traditional trip into Sylva to visit "Grandma's Walmart."  Yes, we have one right down the street from us in Pennsylvania, but it's not the same as Grandma's!  Then over to eat at Ryan's.  We fill our plates many times, not just for the food, but to prolong our good time here.

Harper's Ferry and South

After Gettysburg, we had to get to 81 in Virginia to make our way south.  I did some calculations and realized it would only be an extra 20 minutes of driving if we stopped in Harper's Ferry.  I've wanted to visit this town for quite some time.  Its history is fascinating, from George Washington who persuaded Congress to establish an armory and arsenal there to John Brown's attempt to raid that armory and seize weapons in an effort to end slavery.  People thought Brown was crazy, but many think he got our nation's attention and brought about the Civil War.  Later the town established Storer College to educate former slaves. 

Today it is HOT in Harper's Ferry!  There are many interesting buildings and museums to explore, but none of them are air-conditioned. We visit a few and then walk across the Potomac on a metal bridge that made Fred queasy.  It is too hot to really enjoy any activities and Fred is anxious to hit the road because it is going to be a long driving day.  We don't stay long.

Soon we get on 81 in Winchester.  So many memories from previous trips to Grandma's house when the girls were little!  I think we've visited every Cracker Barrel on this highway at some point in time.  Arielle still loves the little golf tee game while we wait for a meal.  The girls used to explore the toy section and choose some little stickers to keep them busy after they got back in our big green van that had the pull down VHS player.  Fred and I would listen to Barney or Disney princesses as we rode along.  Someone gave us a DVD player to borrow for this trip, but the girls aren't interested.  They are listening to music on their ipods or playing bingo or the license plate game.  No fair!  I can't see well enough to read the plates before Fred does.  He wins every time.  The girls seem to really be enjoying each other's company this time and that makes everyone happy.

We drive as far as the Max Meadows/Fort Chiswell exit in Virginia.  We find a nice hotel and explore the area.  It takes us about one minute to drive through Max Meadows.  I find out later it has a population of 562.  We see a restaurant--Cinco de Mayo Mexican Grill.  Sounds good, and it's the grand opening too!  So we are met at the door by big burly Mexican men who go out of their way to make sure we have a great time.  The décor makes you smile just walking in.  Colorful, whimsical folk art adorns the tables and chairs. It is a fun dinner and the food is fabulous, many varieties of enchiladas made with CORN tortillas!  We like this restaurant so much we stop for lunch on the way home.  The guys seem happy to see us again and even pose for a picture.

We have a great breakfast to start off our next day of driving and the girls enjoy the hotel like they always have--riding on the luggage cart, fighting over who gets to open the door with the electronic key, and swimming in the pool.  They love all the same things even though they are big girls now.  I am thankful to have this special time with them and with Fred once again. 

 
 

Vacation!

 

We haven't gone down south in two years.  Down south is where my extended family lives and I have been missing everyone.  So the next few posts will be a travelogue of our vacation--not too exciting for most readers.  For now I write for Arielle and Liana because they were there and I want them to remember the good times we had.

We left right after the Moore, Oklahoma, tornado.  The images were still vivid in my mind.  I think of the people I saw on TV, their land, their accents, and it is all too familiar. We lived in Mustang in the 80's, about 15 miles from Moore.  I remember the sirens when a tornado was bearing down, the green, angry sky and the fierce winds howling through the house.  No basement, no place to hide.  We got lucky.  The closest touch-down during that time was 8 miles from us.

This day it is great to hit the road and put all that behind us.  Instead of going west, then south, we decide to take a diagonal to 81, stopping in Gettysburg.  It's our favorite nearby vacation spot.  We stop at the visitor's center (again) and then take the auto-tour (again).  It is hot and humid today, so that puts a damper on our desire to get out and walk around the battlefield. The girls want to climb one of the towers though, so we stop there.  Fred never climbs it as he hates heights, but I always do.  Today it is difficult.  Am I so old I can't do this?  Then I realize it has nothing to do with strength and endurance.  It's all about the heat.  It's not just uncomfortable but a health risk for me since I had a heat stroke years ago.  But I made it up, just more slowly than before, all 9 flights of steps.  The view was spectacular!

We ate dinner at Ping's, our very favorite Chinese restaurant, and shopped at Peebles, our favorite store.  Then we found an exhibit we've never visited before--The Lincoln Train Museum.  Fred is a railroad buff and I knew he would enjoy this.  We were the only tourists there and so we were able to take our time and enjoy all the historical information and artifacts.  There is a huge model train display, kind of like the Choo-Choo barn in Strasburg, but most interesting for me was the memorabilia from Lincoln's life, including many photos of him before he was President.  We watched a video about his funeral train as it crossed the country from Washington, D.C. back to Illinois for his burial.  Fascinating stuff.  I can't imagine any other President has ever had such devotion.  In every town where the train stopped, thousands came out to pay their respect. 

After an evening of swimming and a good night's sleep, we were ready for a day of driving. 
 

Blessed with Family!

Could life get any better?  I don't think so.  What a glorious long Mother's Day weekend with my dear and precious family.  I am so grateful to God for all you people who bless my life every day.

Friday night was my granddaughter Laci's 5th birthday party.  We all gather at Nick's house for good food and family time.  Cousins!  The bigger kids run off to play and the adults enjoy the babies.  So many babies!  Even Dominic and Stacia are here with baby Caden, meeting his family for the first time.  Joey is running around chasing the dog and we pass Jordan around to love on her.  Deacon can't be caught so after chasing him around for a hug, we give up.

Saturday Dominic and I head to a greenhouse for a gift for Stacia--her first Mother's Day.  I am so glad to have some time with my son on this beautiful spring day.  Later all of us head to Valley Forge for a walk.  So many memories here!  When we first moved to Pennsylvania from the barren plains of Oklahoma, we would come here often, my little boys and I, marveling at the autumn colors.  The pictures in my mind come to me like ghosts.  Walking through the overgrowth of foliage under the train track so we can see the river.  The boys excitedly running in and out of the log cabins.  Our fearful single file hike down a busy road when we lost the trail through the woods.  I recognize one particular tree where we collected leaves one fall. We wore the giant leaves like hats and the boys jumped joyfully in the crunchy pile. Blond little Jonathan with his Care Bear sitting right over there on the rail fence, my sister beside him.  Deanah is gone now; the fence remains.

Today we make new memories. The family wants to explore Washington's house, so I take baby Caden and walk along the creek, whispering to him until he is asleep.  I tell him how much I love him and how one day I will tell him the story of his first visit here. 

The next day is Mother's Day!  Fred has to usher at church, I so get up early and make breakfast for all the dear people sleeping in this house.  Arielle and Liana present me with gifts and homemade cards that I will treasure and keep forever.  We have a surprise visit from Anthony, Kim and Joey, and our kids filling the kitchen with laughter and talk gives me great joy.  We look through an old photo album and pause at a picture of very young me with my newborn Nicholas.  I look in the faces of those gathered around this table and think, who would ever have guessed back then that I would have ALL THIS? 

The next day Jon, Chrissy and Lana come over and we have a celebratory taco dinner.  They have just come from a doctor's appointment and have new ultrasound pictures.  The new baby is a girl!  Grandchild #10!  But the excitement never fades or grows old.  We can't wait to meet this new person who will join this big, crazy family and who will be so loved by all.

You with little ones right now in the midst of sleepless nights and toddler defiance and runny noses--this is your heritage and your reward!  "Gray hair is a crown of glory..."  Proverbs 16:31.

Last Day of School

Well, not really the last day.  Arielle and Liana won't be finished totally until June.  But the 24 weeks at our co-op is over.  I believe we ended well.  I can't believe I really did all that teaching--considering how fearful I was last summer when I was anticipating all I had to do. 

The girls have flourished at their school.  They are more outgoing and confident.  I attribute this to the kind, loving kids here.  These kids are not clique-ish and are welcoming to everyone.  My daughters were fully loved and accepted, just as all the students are, no matter how quirky they are or how different they might be perceived by the world outside of school.  Arielle made a comment at the beginning of the year that all students here "could just be themselves." 

I found out Arielle and Liana have an inner drive to succeed in school.  They studied hard to complete what was expected of them.  Arielle gave a required speech and I was witness to her poise and assertiveness.  (So unlike me!)  The girls' attitudes toward their teachers were sometimes quite different from their attitude toward me as their teacher!  But that is good.  They are also somewhat competitive.  Little did I know.  I feel we have the best of both worlds right now.  They have this "school" experience in a safe environment, but they are also being homeschooled the way Fred and I long ago determined was best for them.

I also discovered this year that I love teaching. My students are vibrant, energetic kids who  get excited about science and learning. What really surprised me most was that many times other students would join our class unexpectedly during their free time.  We have laughed a lot in class this year and we've done some fun projects.  In physical science it was our cornstarch experiment that was the best.  It was supposed to simulate plastic rock, the proposed theory that a layer of our earth is made of a material like this.  The kids created quite a mess, but they were amazed by the special properties of this mixture and continued to play with it long after class was over.  When we studied electricity, I brought in a gadget Fred made when he was in school to become an electrician.  One boy was so interested in it that Fred let him keep it.

In biology, the awe-factor came from our microscopic study of pond life.  All the kids, including me, were fascinated by the unbelievably complex creatures that live unseen by our eyes.  We also dissected some larger animals, and I was surprised to see there wasn't the ick-factor I'd anticipated.  The kids had a sense of wonder about what lies beneath the skin.

For the first time I was the recipient of all those end-of-the-year teacher gifts--a handwritten card, miniature roses, homemade truffles.  But the laughter and joy in the classroom were the best gifts and I had that all year.

I've been asked to teach biology again and also anatomy and physiology.  My girls will likely take more classes next year at the school, and they are excited about that.  Seeing friends on a regular basis makes all the work worthwhile. 

For now we need to finish up here at home--the grammar, the algebra--those tedious subjects.  And then, I want to clean my house!  Can you imagine what it looks like after 9 months when cleaning is often neglected because other things take top priority?  Well, yes, many of you have seen it.

Back to work...

Baby Caden

So our train arrives and Dominic meets us at the Alexandria station.  How wonderful to see him! My son, now a father.  I long to see him in this role.  We quickly arrive at his beautiful home in Arlington.  And there are Stacia and Caden waiting for us!  My new grandson in my arms!  And Liana's!

 

The weekend is almost magical.  Dominic and Stacia's home is a quiet retreat.  It is light and airy and peaceful.  Sunlight streams throughout and the tall windows bring the outdoors in.  And the outdoors at this time of year is amazing!  Flowering trees adorn every home in the neighborhood--pink and white dogwood, redbuds and fluffy cherries.  Shrubs of all sorts are blooming; every home has an explosion of azaleas surrounding it.  Daffodils, tulips and hibiscus accent the lawns. At Dominic's house, a mother blue jay sits on a nest of five eggs within arm's reach of the front porch. The sky is bright blue and filled with bird song.  The fresh green of spring is dazzling.  New life outside, new life inside this house.  A precious baby boy has been born into our family.

The next day Dominic takes us to Capitol Hill, his old neighborhood before he had a wife and son.  We push baby Caden in his stroller on this bright spring day.  We stroll through a farmer's market and taste cheeses and fruit. We walk along the streets and Dominic goes inside a shop to buy us special coffee.  I hold my tiny grandson tight against me, wrapping my jacket around him in the chilly wind.  A street musician plays a couple of children's songs just for Caden. Liana is soaking up the atmosphere, snapping dozens of pictures. She is unusually quiet, maybe like me, she is caught up in the magic. Later, Caden sleeps on my shoulder as we enjoy lunch at Chipolte and then I feed him his milk under a magnolia tree with shiny leaves as we drink real ginger ale that Dominic got for us.  Caden will not remember this day, but I will--always.

And the day is not over.  That evening Dominic and Liana prepare dinner while I soothe Caden after his busy outing to the city.  Daylight is fading and Dominic puts on some music that adds to the tender moments of the day.  Caden is in my arms and I dance with him across the polished hardwood floors. Tears come as I think about tomorrow and saying good-bye to this sweet baby boy with the big blue eyes.  He will be so changed when I see him again.  I'm reminded of a Longfellow poem.  This night is a song and all the cares of the world slip away as I dance with my grandson.  There is peace in this house.

"Then read from the treasured volume
The poem of thy choice,
And lend to the rhyme of the poet
The beauty of thy voice.
And the night shall be filled with music,
And the cares that infest the day
Shall fold their tents like the Arabs,
And as silently steal away."

Dominic and Liana present us with a feast--risotto cakes stuffed with leeks and bacon and mozzarella cheese, fresh green beans from the market we visited today, cucumber salad.  Stacia takes her baby so he can have his own feast, and then Caden sits peacefully on his mother's lap and I look around the table, wanting to hold this little family and this day in my heart forever. 

Someone once told me that every place you visit leaves a mark on your soul and you will never be the same.  Your eyes and your mind are filled with new sights and sounds and you are forever changed.  It's true.  I'm grateful for this weekend. 


 

Trains

Liana and I are heading off for our grand adventure.  We're going to visit Dominic, Stacia and baby Caden in Arlington. Poor Arielle has been sick and can't go. She is disappointed but she and Fred have other adventures planned.

In light of the events in Boston, Fred and Arielle escort us to the big city station. Fred wants to make sure we board the right train safely. We actually find it is quite easy to take the local train to the Amtrak station where you can go anywhere in the country.  I haven't ridden Amtrak since my father died and I headed down to North Carolina for his memorial service. Maybe that ride back home is on my mind because I am just a little uneasy about train travel this day. Back in 1987 an Amtrak train crashed in Chevy Chase, Maryland, and I was on the train just behind it. We were delayed for hours and ended up boarding buses to our destinations.  Today, the armed men with dogs and guns roaming the station add to my anxiety.

Also, due to events in Boston and that train station closed down, our train is very late.  By the time it finally arrives, people have had plenty of time to become impatient and rude.  Even though we have been standing in line so long, a belligerent man has his way and we are at the end of the line to board.  The train is extremely crowded. Liana and I walk car to car, dragging our suitcases behind us.  There are no seats together, and there are not even any seats where we could sit separated yet still see each other.  I will not leave Liana alone like that.

Right when I have reached my frustration limit, we reach the dining car. Why do I get so stressed out?  God always provides for our needs. But at this time 30 minutes have passed since we left the station and we are still wandering.  I see a beautiful conductor woman in the dining car.  I simply tell her we cannot find any seats.  She jumps into action, asking two women in the car to move their laptops over and tells Liana and me to sit down.  Then she points to a man and woman in the adjoining car that we can see.  She says they will be leaving at the next stop and to get up when we hear it called and take their seats.  She even takes our suitcases down next to these people.  What an angel she is!  So we end up with two very fine seats on the train. 

The best part of the trip is getting off the train and seeing my son in his white dress shirt, hugging him hard, and having him take over.  He carries our bags and loads us in his car.  We're here!  I can't wait to see my new grandson!

In conclusion, I highly recommend Amtrak travel.  The ride home on Sunday was so relaxing and comfortable.  Time flew by as we ate the yummy snacks Dominic had given us and played several games of Quiddler.  Once we got to Philadelphia, we saw that we had exactly two minutes to board the next local train.  And we made it!  When we pulled in our station, there was Fred waiting at the end of our journey.  Home!

Science Camp

The girls did not go to camp.  I did.  What was I thinking?  This I wrote at 5:27 a.m. on a Saturday morning:

I've already had a shower. Of the over 50 women in our bunkhouse, only one other person is up. Lights were out at 11 p.m. the night before, but I couldn't sleep. It was a hot, restless night in a sleeping bag on a bunk, a shelf really.  I was on the bottom near the floor, my friend above me, and another bunk above her. I could have been home in my own comfortable bed next to my husband!  But here I am at a women's retreat, a science camp, to learn fun ways to teach science to our kids.  I'm a science teacher.  This will be good. But I miss my family.

We arrived last night at a beautiful campsite in Amish country.  We checked in at the community center, a nice airy room with many long tables set up laden with fun stuff like science project kits, books, workbooks, colored pencils and huge tubs of chocolate.  They know what women like. We chose our t-shirts and claimed our bunks and then had a buffet dinner with the over 100 other women (two bunkhouses full) who also came to the retreat. There was a lot of food, wheat overload, so I couldn't eat much. So I had some cheese and my gluten-free crackers from home. Then we hiked down to the center for our first session.

Coffee, tea and hot chocolate would be provided 24/7!  Okay, this isn't so bad. We had fun meeting some of the other women, some who had driven over 5 hours from several other states to be here. We are all homeschooling mothers and teachers and we want to learn. I met women of all races with many different accents, young moms and old.  This night we sketched with our pencils, filling in anatomical drawings.  It was not so much to learn the information, but to learn how to present.  I often have my biology students sketch and color, so I guess I'm doing something right.  We found out all the interesting items on the tables are not for sale but are prizes!  Moms like prizes. Unfortunately I didn't win anything until the end when they said anyone who did not get a prize could go up and get one. I got a blood testing kit for Liana.  She has been wanting one.  The grand prize was a life size skeleton!  I would have loved that!  But to win it we had to decorate a plastic frog dissection apron.  When I saw the artistic skills of some of the women, I gave up trying. 

We sat and talked a long time after the session, hoping to get sleepy enough to crash once we got back to the bunkhouse. That didn't happen. I don't know how I'll make it through the day.

And the next day...

Breakfast, heavily processed, wheat everything.  Lunch the same. But at $25 for the whole weekend, I shouldn't complain about the food or the accommodations. We enjoy getting to know some of the women.  I sit next to a woman from Washington, D.C., a tall, elegant woman with long dreadlocks and a colorful scarf.  She just took her high school-aged son out of school.  He sounds brilliant and she wants to expose him to some of the many opportunities available to him in our capitol city.  Another woman told me her history of immigrating from South Africa as a young woman.  Two Chinese women from Connecticut with heavy accents were fascinated by my family and I loved hearing their stories. A strong, beautiful woman from rural West Virginia added another dimension to our conversation.These people made the event worthwhile.  So many women from such varied backgrounds but all of us with a common goal--to educate our children as we see fit, education specifically tailored around our families' values and our individual children's needs.  All these women are striving for excellence and want the best for their children.

Science all day!  9 a.m. to 6 p.m. with just a short lunch break. We did blood testing and extracted DNA from our cheek cells. I am full of ideas on how to make science more exciting for my girls and also for my students.  But my friend and I can't imagine another night in the bunkhouse.  So we bail out early and miss the dissection planned for Sunday morning.  (A pregnant sheep uterus. It would have been fascinating.) 

I am so happy to see my family again!  But now we are preparing for our next grand adventure.  More on that after it happens.