I am witnessing first hand how destructive facebook can be. I've never been a fan of this social networking idea and only opened an account because all my kids were sending me a "friend request." I have nothing on my facebook page except a picture my daughter-in-law sent there (not sure how that works) and there are no comments except the initial one when someone found me there. Arielle would like to have her own page and I'm sure I would have loved it as a girl her age. But she doesn't need another thing to encourage her to spend more time on the computer, and now after what has happened with my other kids, I don't see her having one in the near future.
After a phone call from one son and an e-mail from another directing me to check out the action on facebook, I realized I needed to see what was going on. I read a string of comments on one person's page. This person had a video clip and asked what others thought of it. Others made it clear they didn't like it. So then she defended herself and it went on and on and got ugly. These are family members and they are all adults! They were saying things they would never have said in person. I can only imagine how it goes with high schoolers and their facebook interactions.
While I was reading, a screen popped up and an old friend of mine wanted to talk to me. That was distracting! I tried to respond to her, but I don't think I did it right. So she might think I didn't want to talk to her, which I do, but not right at that moment. So maybe I offended her. Later as I skimmed other friends and their pages, it all just looked so superficial to me. People have said that about e-mail, but at least e-mail is personal. How about people connecting to other people with phone calls? Or dropping by for a visit? I admit I too often neglect this important human interaction. Then there wouldn't be nasty words among family and friends.
Can someone fill me in on what is so great about facebook? I just can't see it. Maybe I'm too old-fashioned. Will we eventually have a whole generation of people who can only communicate with brief comments sent through cyberspace?
You can also tell me your thoughts on blogs. Maybe they are just as bad, I don't know.
5 comments:
Deb,
I am with you. I do not see the attraction of "Facebook". I am too private of a person for this. It even took me a long time to post any responses to your blog, because I am not comfortable responding in a format that anyone can read or see. One of my nephews has a band and uses "Facebook" to advertise his band and keep connected with his fans. This makes perfect sense to me. There are a number of professional social networks on the web also (for example, LinkedIn). I guess they serve a purpose. I have been told that you need to be connected via a professional social network as a prerequisite to finding a job and that you should post a photo too. That is getting way too personal for me. I have seen the ugly side of "Facebook". My niece was personally attacked on-line. I don't know the details but it got very nasty. This can destroy lives and ruin reputations. It appears that the younger generation needs to be "connected" 24/7 via cell phone, text messaging, or some social network. To me it is narcissism. They can't be "alone". I have seen couples out to eat talking not to their partner across the table but to someone else on their cell phone. We appear to be losing a personal connection.
J
Thanks for sharing your opinion. Of course, we agree! Opposing opinions welcome too. I am thinking back to a few days ago when I shared a cup of tea (chai!) with a good friend. Facebook can never take the place of that kind of meaningful social interaction. Real time with friends refreshes us and brings joy to our lives.
I agree to some extent with the superficiality. I think people feel like they can just spew out whatever is on their mind. They don't think. Honestly, I think you get true thoughts there and egos run a muck. I am thankful for Facebook though. I have remained in touch with mama friends from the city I used to live in and grown even closer to some of them. Being pretty isolated, sometimes Facebook is the only way I have adult conversations throughout the day. I don't like the telephone and while I love writing letters, others don't. So, it is the easiest way to keep in touch with those you have friendships with. It has really been a help to me. Yet, I do agree that people need to watch themselves and where their heart is pertaining to others.
Blogs bother me more than Facebook. Yet, I enjoy them as well. I'm very private, so I feel weird sometimes sharing things, but in the long run it is good. Really private things stay that way.
Kelli,
I can understand how facebook would be meaningful in your circumstances. When I first had e-mail I re-connected with old friends and even family members and I thought it was the greatest thing ever. Okay, tell me why blogs bother you. You, the woman who writes such an interesting blog!
Hi Deb,
I was just skimming your blog and I saw this facebook stuff. I think it is crazy in this day of identity theft and creepy stalkers. I don't even have an account but I can go on and find people I haven't seen in decades and who their friends are. Those with bad intentions can see people's faces and names and, with the internet, can find where they live. It is too creepy for me! Plus, I have trouble finding time for people who are in my life now whom I love so why should I be spending time communicating with people who, without facebook, wouldn't know or care if I was even alive!
T.R.
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